Can I have whatever your not using?


She came home early and found her husband
in their bedroom making
love to a very attractive young woman.


The wife was VERY upset!“You are a disrespectful pig!” she cried.
“How dare you do this to
me ? a faithful wife, the mother of your
children! I’m leaving you. I
want a divorce straight away!”



And he replied:





“Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I
can tell you what






And he began:

“Well, I was getting into the car to drive
home and this young lady
here asked me for a lift. She looked so
down and out and defenseless that
I took pity on her and let her into the
car. I noticed that she was
very thin, not well dressed and very

She told me that she hadn’t eaten for
three days! So, in my
compassion, I brought her home and warmed
up the enchiladas I made for you last
night, the ones you wouldn’t eat because
you’re afraid you’ll put on
weight. The poor thing devoured them in

Since she needed a good clean-up I
suggested a shower and while she
was doing that I noticed her clothes were
dirty and full of holes so I
threw them away. Then, as she needed
clothes, I gave her the designer
jeans that you have had for a few years,
but don’t wear because you say
they are too tight. I also gave her the
underwear that was your
anniversary present, which you don’t wear
because I don’t have good taste.

I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you
for Christmas that you
don’t wear just to annoy her and I also
donated those boots you bought at
the expensive boutique and don’t wear
because someone at work has a pair
like them.”

He took a quick breath and continued:
“She was so grateful for my understanding
and help and as I walked
her to the door she turned to me with
tears in her eyes and said
‘Please… …do you have anything else
that your wife doesn’t use?'”




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Filed under Comedy, Humor, Jokes

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