Taxes

History Lesson on Taxes

At first I thought this was funny…then
I realized the awful truth of it.
Be sure to read all the way to the end!

Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he’s fed.

Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.

Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.

Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.

Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he
Tries to think.

Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers,
If he cries, then
Tax his tears.

Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways
To tax his ass

Tax all he has
Then let him know
That you won’t be done
Till he has no dough.

When he screams and hollers,
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till
He’s good and sore.

Then tax his coffin ,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in
Which he’s laid.

Put these words
upon his tomb,
” Taxes drove me to my doom…”

When he’s gone,
Do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax.

Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Excise Taxes
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel Permit Tax
Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)
Gross Receipts Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Inventory Tax
IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Personal Property Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service Charge Tax
Social Security Tax
RoadUsage Tax
Sales Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone Federal Excise Tax
Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes
Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax
Telephone State and Local Tax
Telephone Usage Charge Tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft Registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax

STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?
Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago,
and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.
We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest
middle class in the world, and Mom stayed home to
raise the kids.

WTF Happened?

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3 Comments

Filed under Comedy, Humor, Jokes, Thoughts

3 responses to “Taxes

  1. I misread “Medicare tax” as “mediocre tax.” I had a Creative Writing professor once tell me that there are no typos, your subconscious will move you to write “Mary looks devilish” instead of “Mary looks delicious”, so maybe similarly there are no…. reados?
    Mediocre Tax! Now I’ve gone and suggested a new one. Great.

    Like

  2. Hmm, yes it’s still pretty funny. Methinks I’ll fall under the new tax category …..hmmm….

    Like

  3. @oldladypenpal & Aristocrat

    God, I hope they never make a mediocre tax. Anyone who is not rich, famous, or lucky enough to win the lottery(thus making them at least rich) who be considered for that tax.

    Pretty much about 90% of americans would have to pay that tax. They could almost accomplish the same thing with a Fat Tax.

    AXE

    Like

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